Alone
by PartHeart
Summary: "Alone. Yes, that's the key word, the most awful word in the English tongue. Murder doesn't hold a candle to it and hell is only a poor synonym." ― Stephen King. Zosia March stumbles across Jac Naylor in a moment of weakness.


**"Alone. Yes, that's the key word, the most awful word in the English tongue. Murder doesn't hold a candle to it and hell is only a poor synonym."**

 **― Stephen King**

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She found her hunched over. Alone. She was silent but Zosia could tell from the way her lips were pressed tightly together that it was taking almost all of her control to stop a moan of pain from leaving her mouth. Quietly she shut the office door behind her, hiding the consultant's moment of weakness from the rest of the ward.

Jac's eyes had flickered to the door as it had opened. Any other time she would have jumped to her feet but the agonising cramps had drained her energy. She squeezed her eye shut, hoping her junior would have the sense to leave her alone.

"Ms Naylor?" Zosia took a step forward, cautiously watching her mentor. The way she was curled in the corner reminded her of an animal in pain, hiding itself away from the world and liable to a volatile reaction if it were to be disturbed. "What's wrong?"

"Don't." She breathed the word, turning her head away. She defiantly moved to her feet- embarrassed to be caught in a moment of fallibility. However as she attempted to straighten up a sharp stab of pain shot across her abdomen, causing her to whimper. "Get out."

The younger doctor frowned, ignoring the demand as she bridged the gap between them, grabbing out to support her. "No."

Anger flashed in her eyes and she halfheartedly attempted to shake Zosia off. "Do I need to remind you who you're talking to, Dr March?"

"Jac." She sighed, exasperated that infuriatingly stubborn, _bloodyminded_ , consultant attempted to act as if she hadn't just been caught cowering in pain. "Tell me what's going on."

She froze as she said her name, uncomfortable that the professional boundaries were crumbling down. God, she was tired. Tired of hiding her pain. Tired of pretending that everything was okay, that everything was just rosy thank you very much, when it couldn't be further from the truth. She longed to be held- to feel the warmth of another human being. She wanted to be safe in the knowledge that everything was going to be okay. To have someone murmur soft reassurances in her ear as her body waged war with itself. But she was Jac Naylor. She had a reputation to uphold. With increasingly ragged breath she pushed Zosia away from her once more.

Typical. Zosia watched the woman with equal measures of exasperation and admiration, darkened by an underlying frustration and anger. Any idiot could see that she was in a considerable amount of pain yet she still resisted the offer of help- pushing away a supportive shoulder to lean on. Folding her arms, she observed Jac cling to the edge of her desk for support. Zosia sighed. Why would any human choose a cold plain of glass as their crutch when there was a living, breathing, empathetic alternative? "Even now..." The words bubbled curiously to her lips and flowed forth before she had a chance to consider moderating them. "You are still _so cold_. Who made you like this?" She demanded. "Who made you such a heartless bitch?"

"I told you to get out." She growled. Her eyes narrowed into defensive slits. One hand gripped tightly to her desk, the knuckles white, skin taught, as she counted on it to remain upright. Her other hand was pressed protectively against her abdomen.

Zosia shrugged, hoping that she wasn't about to collapse, concerned by the way the colour had drained from her face. "I ignored you. You don't look too good."

She grimaced. Taking a deep breath she made another attempt to straighten up to her full height. The pain teared across her unrelentingly, causing a pathetic whimper of pain. She squeezed her eyes shut as she immediately doubled up, wishing the ground would swallow her up so she wouldn't have to face the humiliation of a junior doctor catching her at a moment such as this.

"Stop trying to stand if it hurts." She berated her, her tone juxtaposed by the softness of her touch as she reached out and guided Jac over to the sofa. Zosia sat down first then carefully pulled Jac with her, an arm wrapped supportively around her waist. To her surprise her mentor didn't protest, but by the way she'd curled up on herself she assumed she no longer had the energy. "Has this happened before? She inquired, her voice now soft.

Jac groaned in agony, deciding that there was little point in trying to hide her pain now most of her dignity had already been stripped from her. With her eyes screwed tightly shut she nodded. "My prescription ran out. I haven't had the time to go to the pharmacy. It hasn't flared up like this in a while."

Slowly she nodded, not taking her eyes off the woman who was curled up against her. When she'd asked the question she hadn't expected her to answer. "Right." She took a deep breath, wondering how much prying was acceptable before it became too much and irreparably damaged their professional relationship. "Prescription for what?"

"Diclofenac and coedine." Jac reluctantly muttered, opening her eyes to watch Zosia's response. Knowing she wouldn't get away with a half explanation she continued with a sigh. "Endometriosis."

Zosia's eyes widened, then softened. "I see." As Jac groaned again she took pity, moving to her feet with a sense of purpose. "I know it's not the same but Mama used to get awful period pain. She swore by heat pads. Stay here, I'll pick up your prescription and get some things to help."

Confusion passed over Jac's face and she fixed her junior with a tired, questioning look. "Why are you doing this?"

A sad sort of half smile spread over Zosia's lips. "Because even the mighty Jac Naylor has moments of weakness and no one should have to put up with that level of pain. Especially not on their own."

Jac nodded, taken by surprise by the sudden lump in her throat and prickling of unshed tears. As she met the warmth of Zosia's deep brown eyes she smiled weakly in return. The pain hadn't diminished, but she no longer felt utterly helpless. At that moment she was not _alone_.

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 **Just a short one shot because I'm a sucker for Jasia, whether it's platonic or otherwise. Please review and let me know your thoughts :)**


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